It never fails.

Chris doesn't travel that much for work.  He has two, one-week-long commitments each year for his employer.  One is in June, the other in October.  He's away now.

I can count on a couple of things happening when Chris travels.

1)  I always get sick.  Not "gonna die" sick, but functioning sick.  Just enough to feel crummy and want to rest.  Chris left our home at 4:30 a.m. on Saturday.  At 1:30 a.m. - three hours before he departed - I was hit with a head cold.  I woke him up.  "Hey.  I'm sick.  Isn't that unfrickin believable?  Always happens when you leave town.  Sorry to wake you."

2)  At least one of the kids vomits in the middle of the night.  I'm not talking about a child waking you up saying their stomach hurts, and you gently guide them to the toilet, they get sick, you brush their teeth and put them back to bed. 

I'm talking about a child running into your room crying and gasping, the smell preceding them, you jump from your bed to the child, pick them up or push them hard, and get them to the bathroom so they can spit the last teaspoon of sick into a toilet.  The rest of the sick has hit every linen on their bed (including the dust ruffle), the wall (including baseboards), and marked a trail on the carpet from their room to yours.  A Hansel and Gretel technique.

The good news is, we've not had a vomit incident.  I hesitate to even type that.  Chris would shush me and call me crazy for giving this a voice.  He's not superstitious, but he would consider this too serious to tempt.

The bad news is, I'm sick.  Mother would say, "Lets focus on the positives!

• The kids aren't sick!  Well, except Toddler Child, but that's just a little congestion.

• Everyone's finally sleeping through the night!  [It's honestly been years in our house.]

• You have the WHOLE bed to yourself!

• Your hair's been looking much better lately!

• Oh, and you're not pregnant!"