The view from my parasitic head.

Toddler Child arrived screamin' and clingin' almost three years ago - and he hasn't stopped.  He's cute but fiery, and no matter what I do, I can't shake him.  He either hangs on me or I'm restraining him, but we're rarely apart.  If I putter around the house, he follows me and says, "Wat-cha dooo-in?"  If I sit on the couch with the newspaper he wants to sit as close as possible.  He says, "Can I touch you skin?"

Like all toddlers he loves expensive gadgets, only if they're not his, and Chris, I, or his brothers would prefer he not play with them.  On occasion he finds one of the small digital cameras and leaves us some surprises. 

He's a determined boy and makes loud noises when he's not happy.  We're old and tired, so he wins.  Don't send "Miracle Nanny" or whoever - we're comfortable with our caving strategy.  Sometimes just to make the screaming stop, we give him the camera.  So I can pack a picnic lunch, so Chris can drive in peace, so I can cut his hair, or so we can medicate while coping with the reality of the love nest on our Colorado trip. [Photos courtesy of Toddler Child]

Eventually we have to take the camera away from him because... well... I don't know why we take it away, because we always give it back to him when this happens.

If we don't give him the camera, it's my skin, which means Toddler Child and I are together...again.